Monday, January 31, 2011
Friday, January 28, 2011
Home Spun comic strip #576
Great story about drawing this comic strip:
When I originally inked it in, I accidentally drew a speech balloon around Jess' words when I had intended to make it a thought. I figured I could fix it when I scanned it onto the computer. Of course, now that I was on the computer, aka the Great Distraction Factory, I figured I should update my Facebook page (I think it's some unwritten law for Facebook users). For my status I wrote, "Don't you just hate it when you make a speech balloon where you meant to put a thought bubble?" I thought you might enjoy some of the responses...
~Just as much as I hate it when I speak without thinking first! : )
~hmmmm... let me think about that.... doh!
~I think aloud all the time. LOL
~Hmm..I think there's some deep insight in there somewhere...
~Many things which should be in thought bubbles come out in speech balloons.
~ I guess it is the cartoonist's equivalent to sticking your foot in your mouth :D
And my personal favorite...
~Did you know that if you think outside in sub-zero temps your thought bubbles will freeze?
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Home Spun comic strip #575
In the mood for a great game if you are stuck inside all day? Play obstacle course! See how fast you can run across the living room, kitchen, hall, etc. without tripping on the latest architectural masterpiece, skidding on trains or cars, or stepping on the latest glitter glue laden creation. Bonus points for long jumps, sudden side steps, and balance maneuvers. You can handicap your score if you have to avoid pets zig-zagging underfoot while you cross the floor.
Tuesday, January 25, 2011
Tips for Running a Successful Homeschooling Program
Start with a core group: Find two or three families that share your interest and work well with your children. Before we started Homespun Storytellers, we discussed the idea with the families of two of Marina's friends and met for several months before offering it to the homeschooling community. This helped to assure that there would be at least three families when we officially ran the group and they would always be prepared.
Decide on a time that works for your schedule: Since you are running the group, it is most important that you show up for your own event. If you can't commit to a particular day and time, how do you expect other families to? Once your group has been established, you can discuss the possibility of any time/day changes together. Our group originally ran on the third Wednesday of the month at 11am. After several years, it was decided to change the time to 12 noon. This gave several families a little more wiggle room if they were trying to cover subjects in the morning or if they needed more time to travel from greater distances.
Whenever possible, be all inclusive: This is a big mistake I have seen among new homeschoolers. You might want to set up a group just for girls between the ages of 6 and 9 to accommodate your only daughter, but the reality is you will draw more interest if you broaden your age range and allow both boys and girls. If I wanted to have my kids play with only one age group, I would send them to school where divisions have already been made. As a mother of two girls and a boy of varying ages, I am more likely to go to an activity that at least two of my children can be involved in.
Make friends with your host: Whether your program is held in a public area or in someone's home, always be a proper guest. Make sure you leave the area as you found it. Try to intermediate if there are any problems between one of your group members and the host. Be gracious and thank your host for the use of their space. Feel free to offer a gift during the holidays. We always give our librarians an assortment of cookies as a thank you. I've also given them book and DVD donations from time to time. This lets them know that you appreciate that they let you use the space.
Try to keep down costs: Another mistake I have seen is organizing long term events that are costly up front. Most homeschooling families have enough expenses, and we are usually stretching one salary to meet them. If one of my children is in martial arts and another takes dance, I have limited funds remaining for costly activities, no matter how educational. My children would have to be begging me to go for me to put down a lot of money for an extra costly activity.
Always plan for free time: It's always best to have a buffer of time when the kids can just enjoy each other's company without parental involvement. We always invite families to plan to stay after storytelling since there is a playground and ballfield right outside the library. In the winter, we tell families to bring sleds as there is a great sledding hill. Sometimes our children spend twice as much time playing as they did at the program itself.
Advertise: Once you have set up your program, tell people about it! If you have a local homeschooling newsletter, advertise it. Send email reminders to your homeschooling community one week to four days before the event. Why am I so specific? Reminders sent earlier than one week before tend to be forgotten. Too close to the day of the event and many homeschoolers have already committed to something else.
Be Patient: Again, this is why you start with a core group of families. Our monthly event didn't take off from the start. Our first year we mainly read to each other. It was the effort of keeping it in mind through advertising and inviting others that made it successful.
Grow with your program: Our storytelling program started with only our core group doing the storytelling. As interest picked up, many parents would ask me if their children could read as well. We accommodated by offering a "guest storytellers" segment of the program. Then it became clear that many of the guest storytellers were reading too softly to be heard or picking stories that were too long. The program time was getting too long. I started running annual workshops in September to teach storytelling to everyone. I later added a second workshop since we tended to lose some of our core group to other commitments in March.
Even a successful program will have slumps: Another event might overlap and cause conflicts for your program. In the winter, we sometimes lose people to ice skating or someone may plan a limited time program at a museum or park that overlaps with our event. Sometimes viruses hit the community and you end up with several families missing due to illness. We have had years where hardly anyone came and years when we didn't have enough chairs for the amount of people who came. Likewise, the ages of the children fluctuates. Some years we have had many young children that couldn't sit through a long story and other years we had more teenagers. Sometimes there are more boys, sometimes there are more girls. We have been running our monthly storytelling group for almost ten years now, so I can assure you these fluctuations are natural. Don't be discouraged. Keep advertising your activity and letting people know about it. Consistency is the key to success.
Decide on a time that works for your schedule: Since you are running the group, it is most important that you show up for your own event. If you can't commit to a particular day and time, how do you expect other families to? Once your group has been established, you can discuss the possibility of any time/day changes together. Our group originally ran on the third Wednesday of the month at 11am. After several years, it was decided to change the time to 12 noon. This gave several families a little more wiggle room if they were trying to cover subjects in the morning or if they needed more time to travel from greater distances.
Whenever possible, be all inclusive: This is a big mistake I have seen among new homeschoolers. You might want to set up a group just for girls between the ages of 6 and 9 to accommodate your only daughter, but the reality is you will draw more interest if you broaden your age range and allow both boys and girls. If I wanted to have my kids play with only one age group, I would send them to school where divisions have already been made. As a mother of two girls and a boy of varying ages, I am more likely to go to an activity that at least two of my children can be involved in.
Make friends with your host: Whether your program is held in a public area or in someone's home, always be a proper guest. Make sure you leave the area as you found it. Try to intermediate if there are any problems between one of your group members and the host. Be gracious and thank your host for the use of their space. Feel free to offer a gift during the holidays. We always give our librarians an assortment of cookies as a thank you. I've also given them book and DVD donations from time to time. This lets them know that you appreciate that they let you use the space.
Try to keep down costs: Another mistake I have seen is organizing long term events that are costly up front. Most homeschooling families have enough expenses, and we are usually stretching one salary to meet them. If one of my children is in martial arts and another takes dance, I have limited funds remaining for costly activities, no matter how educational. My children would have to be begging me to go for me to put down a lot of money for an extra costly activity.
Always plan for free time: It's always best to have a buffer of time when the kids can just enjoy each other's company without parental involvement. We always invite families to plan to stay after storytelling since there is a playground and ballfield right outside the library. In the winter, we tell families to bring sleds as there is a great sledding hill. Sometimes our children spend twice as much time playing as they did at the program itself.
Advertise: Once you have set up your program, tell people about it! If you have a local homeschooling newsletter, advertise it. Send email reminders to your homeschooling community one week to four days before the event. Why am I so specific? Reminders sent earlier than one week before tend to be forgotten. Too close to the day of the event and many homeschoolers have already committed to something else.
Be Patient: Again, this is why you start with a core group of families. Our monthly event didn't take off from the start. Our first year we mainly read to each other. It was the effort of keeping it in mind through advertising and inviting others that made it successful.
Grow with your program: Our storytelling program started with only our core group doing the storytelling. As interest picked up, many parents would ask me if their children could read as well. We accommodated by offering a "guest storytellers" segment of the program. Then it became clear that many of the guest storytellers were reading too softly to be heard or picking stories that were too long. The program time was getting too long. I started running annual workshops in September to teach storytelling to everyone. I later added a second workshop since we tended to lose some of our core group to other commitments in March.
Even a successful program will have slumps: Another event might overlap and cause conflicts for your program. In the winter, we sometimes lose people to ice skating or someone may plan a limited time program at a museum or park that overlaps with our event. Sometimes viruses hit the community and you end up with several families missing due to illness. We have had years where hardly anyone came and years when we didn't have enough chairs for the amount of people who came. Likewise, the ages of the children fluctuates. Some years we have had many young children that couldn't sit through a long story and other years we had more teenagers. Sometimes there are more boys, sometimes there are more girls. We have been running our monthly storytelling group for almost ten years now, so I can assure you these fluctuations are natural. Don't be discouraged. Keep advertising your activity and letting people know about it. Consistency is the key to success.
Monday, January 24, 2011
Home Spun comic strip #574
I'm very grateful to Once Upon a Family and Malia Li'i Kula for posting their results of the frozen soap bubble experiment. We had some limited success with it in our 18 degree weather. This year we also caught snowflakes to study under a magnifying glass. Make sure the paper is chilled before you catch them. This prevents the ice crystals from melting too fast.
Friday, January 21, 2011
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Home Spun comic strip #572
Sierra was a bit older than a toddler when we took her to a book signing at The Voracious Reader. She had Matthew Van Fleet's first book, "Dog," so we thought she would enjoy his latest, "Cat." And she did. But she didn't really understand this whole book signing thing. When we got home, she got a marker and finished "signing" every page of the new book and started on the older book before I realized what was happening.
Moral: Make sure the child understands why the author is writing in her book.
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Carnival at Alasandra's
Is anyone else in need of spring flowers? If so, head on over to the latest Carnival of Homeschooling: Alasandra's Garden happening at Alasandra's Homeschool Blog.
Monday, January 17, 2011
Home Spun comic strip #571
I hear a lot of new homeschoolers lament the fact that they weren't good at certain subjects. "How will I teach my darling child algebra if I was never good at it?" they cry. Or whatever the subject might be. For me, it was most forms of higher math and science.
I may never fully understand how to plot 2x = y on a graph or calculate the quadratic formula, but I can try to find resources that explain it different ways. I may not remember how my tutor, Mr. Lanahan, drilled proofs into my head so that I could pass geometry, but I can call up friends and family with more mathematical minds to help me out. And I can also choose to allow my children to explore subjects on their own, without interference, and every now and then they will come back and explain difficult concepts to me.
If I want my children to be open and unafraid of new ideas, I must show them that it is not so terrible to be confused and not understand. What is important is a willingness to learn, to recognize that making mistakes is part of the process of learning and find answers. These are the skills I most want my children to know.
Friday, January 14, 2011
Home Spun comic strip #570
The truce regarding books that everyone in our family reads: The final chapters had to be read aloud. There were times when Marina failed to follow this rule simply because she doesn't notice chapters when she is engrossed in a story. Then again, she was much better at not giving things away. Like some kids. And...some grown ups. But in my defense, I don't always notice who is listening when I talk about books.
I sincerely hope it will not be long before Sierra joins our group reads. Right now she fluctuates between Daisy Meadows' Fairy series, Animal Ark and Nancy Drew. She is reading, so I won't complain. I'm sure there will be many family reads she can join in when she shows an interest in our books.
Thursday, January 13, 2011
Speak Softly and Carry a Big Stick (Bug)
Back in October, the park ranger where we take nature classes asked if we would be interested in taking some stick bugs. They keep stick bugs in the nature center to demonstrate camouflage. There were so many they were overcrowding the cage. They aren't native to our area, so they couldn't simply be released into the wild. After thinking about it, we came back the following week with a cage and took home five stick bugs.
These have to be my most favorite pet ever. They have very few requirements. A cage with some dirt and sticks, a spray bottle to mist them every day, and all they eat are leaves. I can do leaves. I don't have to worry about leaves escaping the way the crickets would when we kept anoles.
We did have a couple of mishaps. When we first transferred them to their new home, we lost one. Stick bug camouflage is very effective. We couldn't find it for hours until Sierra decided to spray water in the tank. The missing stick bug was sitting on the spray bottle. In our defense, the bottle had a floral pattern on it that made it difficult to see. Stick bugs specialize in hiding in plain sight. The second mishap occurred two months later, on Christmas Eve. Dusty had taken to sitting on top of the stick bug tank. When I went to take her off, she dug her nails into the screen lid and toppled the tank. Four of the stick bugs were accounted for, but it took us some time carefully sifting through tank debris to find the fifth. It's hard to find something that isn't moving and resembles the sticks in its tank. It didn't survive suddenly getting buried by dirt.
Camouflage can be a good thing and a bad thing. The good thing is that it took months for the cats to realize we had them. The anole and its cricket food was noticed from the first day we brought it home. We really needed to work hard to keep the cats from harming it. The stick bugs existence went unnoticed until the end of December, when Merlin happened to see them move after I sprayed them.
Sierra loves the stick bugs. Whenever she takes one out to hold, it raises its front legs in the air and sways as if it is doing the wave or shouting "Alleluia!" They look unreal, like something a child put together that came to life. I suppose that would add to their appeal if I were a child. There is something exciting about a piece of wood coming to life. Think Pinocchio.
Sierra has learned a lot from watching them. They have tiny antennae on their head. They sway sometimes, as if they are twigs that have been stirred by a breeze. They molt when they get bigger and then they eat their own molt. I wonder, can you still be considered vegetarian if you eat your own molt? Or would it be like taking off a too small shirt and eating it rather than throwing it out? That does happens to be one of my favorite features about them. They are very neat creatures that clean up after themselves. I also like that they don't knock things over, wake me up in the wee hours of the morning or yowl loudly when they are hungry.
These have to be my most favorite pet ever. They have very few requirements. A cage with some dirt and sticks, a spray bottle to mist them every day, and all they eat are leaves. I can do leaves. I don't have to worry about leaves escaping the way the crickets would when we kept anoles.
We did have a couple of mishaps. When we first transferred them to their new home, we lost one. Stick bug camouflage is very effective. We couldn't find it for hours until Sierra decided to spray water in the tank. The missing stick bug was sitting on the spray bottle. In our defense, the bottle had a floral pattern on it that made it difficult to see. Stick bugs specialize in hiding in plain sight. The second mishap occurred two months later, on Christmas Eve. Dusty had taken to sitting on top of the stick bug tank. When I went to take her off, she dug her nails into the screen lid and toppled the tank. Four of the stick bugs were accounted for, but it took us some time carefully sifting through tank debris to find the fifth. It's hard to find something that isn't moving and resembles the sticks in its tank. It didn't survive suddenly getting buried by dirt.
Camouflage can be a good thing and a bad thing. The good thing is that it took months for the cats to realize we had them. The anole and its cricket food was noticed from the first day we brought it home. We really needed to work hard to keep the cats from harming it. The stick bugs existence went unnoticed until the end of December, when Merlin happened to see them move after I sprayed them.
Sierra loves the stick bugs. Whenever she takes one out to hold, it raises its front legs in the air and sways as if it is doing the wave or shouting "Alleluia!" They look unreal, like something a child put together that came to life. I suppose that would add to their appeal if I were a child. There is something exciting about a piece of wood coming to life. Think Pinocchio.
Sierra has learned a lot from watching them. They have tiny antennae on their head. They sway sometimes, as if they are twigs that have been stirred by a breeze. They molt when they get bigger and then they eat their own molt. I wonder, can you still be considered vegetarian if you eat your own molt? Or would it be like taking off a too small shirt and eating it rather than throwing it out? That does happens to be one of my favorite features about them. They are very neat creatures that clean up after themselves. I also like that they don't knock things over, wake me up in the wee hours of the morning or yowl loudly when they are hungry.
Which leads to another lesson learned from watching animals...
A tidy guest is a welcome guest.
A tidy guest is a welcome guest.
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Monday, January 10, 2011
Friday, January 7, 2011
Thursday, January 6, 2011
The Gift of the Magical
Feliz Dia de los Reyes! Happy Little Christmas to all of my readers! For those of you who have been here a while, you know today holds a special place in my heart as my "little birthday." For those of you who are new to my blog, you can start here and find links to the original story.
Last night, my children left hay and water for the camels of the wise men. I felt a little sad about it all. Marina is 17 now. Chase is 14. I wonder how many years I have left to wait for the Kings with them. How many years to continue the tradition of my father's family with my own children? Two stories come to mind today.
~When I was a child, my father always told me about his experience with little Christmas. Every year on January 5th, he set out water and hay for the camels. Every year on the morning of January 6th, the water and hay would be gone, but no gift was left because they were very poor. This did not deter him. Every year he set out water and hay until one year he received a gift of a toy car (I think it was a Jeep.) He loved that toy. It was a most cherished gift. Even after his brother accidentally broke it, he still played with it.
~Several years ago, Marina was having a talk with her grandma (my mother.) She must have been seven or eight at the time. I forget the details of the talk, but I do remember when she suddenly told her grandma with great urgency, "But grandma, you have to believe in magic! You have to!" Grandma, amused, asked her why it was so important. Marina blurted, "Because little kids believe in magic and Jesus said you have to come to him like a little child!"
I pondered these stories as I prepared for St. Nicholas Day in December (that's when we hang stockings according to German custom--my mom is part German) and again as I prepared for Little Christmas. I know many people complain about Santa's presence in Christmas. But for a child, the magic of the season is a way for them to learn what it means to believe, to have faith in something. They are not mini adults. They don't think like us. Their world is magical. For them, the magic is seeing a cold, dead world burst into life in spring, watching a chick emerge from an egg, or seeing a shooting star cross the night sky. We explain these things, but to a child those explanations don't matter. They see the world with wondering eyes, full of their own creative spirit. Santa, St. Nicholas, the Three Kings, they are also part of this magical world, as is Christmas. Christmastime transforms the ordinary with decorations and lights, with delicious smells and songs. It is a time for children. They don't worry about the implications of commercialism on the holiday. They just know that if they write their letters, Santa will come and bring them what they ask for. If they leave food for the camels, the Three Kings will leave a gift.
And if they don't? Well, in my father's words from his last comment: "the one activity I enjoyed most was to plan how I would feast the 3 kings camels with grass and water so that I could look under my bed tomorrow morning to be surprised by the gifts they left me, or didn't. Either way it was the dream that counted most, not the reality of what actually happened the next day. Kids and adults alike love to dream. Dream long enough and believe it. Those dreams will become reality."
Our traditions are the basis of our faith. Whatever your culture or religion, our celebrations touch our children in a special way. The joy it brings to them is magical.
Last night, my children left hay and water for the camels of the wise men. I felt a little sad about it all. Marina is 17 now. Chase is 14. I wonder how many years I have left to wait for the Kings with them. How many years to continue the tradition of my father's family with my own children? Two stories come to mind today.
~When I was a child, my father always told me about his experience with little Christmas. Every year on January 5th, he set out water and hay for the camels. Every year on the morning of January 6th, the water and hay would be gone, but no gift was left because they were very poor. This did not deter him. Every year he set out water and hay until one year he received a gift of a toy car (I think it was a Jeep.) He loved that toy. It was a most cherished gift. Even after his brother accidentally broke it, he still played with it.
~Several years ago, Marina was having a talk with her grandma (my mother.) She must have been seven or eight at the time. I forget the details of the talk, but I do remember when she suddenly told her grandma with great urgency, "But grandma, you have to believe in magic! You have to!" Grandma, amused, asked her why it was so important. Marina blurted, "Because little kids believe in magic and Jesus said you have to come to him like a little child!"
I pondered these stories as I prepared for St. Nicholas Day in December (that's when we hang stockings according to German custom--my mom is part German) and again as I prepared for Little Christmas. I know many people complain about Santa's presence in Christmas. But for a child, the magic of the season is a way for them to learn what it means to believe, to have faith in something. They are not mini adults. They don't think like us. Their world is magical. For them, the magic is seeing a cold, dead world burst into life in spring, watching a chick emerge from an egg, or seeing a shooting star cross the night sky. We explain these things, but to a child those explanations don't matter. They see the world with wondering eyes, full of their own creative spirit. Santa, St. Nicholas, the Three Kings, they are also part of this magical world, as is Christmas. Christmastime transforms the ordinary with decorations and lights, with delicious smells and songs. It is a time for children. They don't worry about the implications of commercialism on the holiday. They just know that if they write their letters, Santa will come and bring them what they ask for. If they leave food for the camels, the Three Kings will leave a gift.
And if they don't? Well, in my father's words from his last comment: "the one activity I enjoyed most was to plan how I would feast the 3 kings camels with grass and water so that I could look under my bed tomorrow morning to be surprised by the gifts they left me, or didn't. Either way it was the dream that counted most, not the reality of what actually happened the next day. Kids and adults alike love to dream. Dream long enough and believe it. Those dreams will become reality."
Our traditions are the basis of our faith. Whatever your culture or religion, our celebrations touch our children in a special way. The joy it brings to them is magical.
Wednesday, January 5, 2011
Home Spun comic strip #566
I don't know if this is particular to my family. Aside from large groups, they also have issues with any sport involving ice. My kids like to be warm. They would rather sit and talk, or work on art projects with their friends than skate endlessly in a circle until they are tired, cranky, and hungry. But they have sacrificed comfort to do things with their friends. As long as they have time to sit and chat afterward. When planning any activity, it is always a good idea bring a snack and plan some free time for the kids to simply be with their friends. It will leave happier memories of the activity and leave everyone more relaxed at the end of the day.
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
Carnival at Why Homeschool
Hello! Its name is the Carnival of Homeschooling: The Princess Bride edition. You homeschool your kids. Prepare to enjoy (some good blog reading!)
This special 5th anniversary edition of the carnival is brought to you by Why Homeschool!
Monday, January 3, 2011
Home Spun comic strip #565
My idyllic image of childhood is the sight of a large mob of children, happily laughing and playing together. I don't know where this came from. When I was in elementary school a long, long, long...long time ago, I was a loner. I liked playing with others, but really on a one to one basis. There weren't many kids on my street, and I had many bad experiences trying to fit in with big groups that met in the schoolyard or around the corner from my home. Some of us just don't do well in crowds. Which is fine.
I always thought it was my duty to make sure I exposed my children to lots of kids. Should the question ever come up, I wanted to be able to confidently answer, "Yes, they get plenty of socialization!" The only problem was that we often met extremely unsocialized children in the playground and other places after school hours. I also noticed my children preferred better quality time than the chaos that can be found on a sledding hill on a snow day. They like interacting one on one or with a small group of friends. They do have friends who prefer large groups, but for my own, that is unnecessary. Not every child interacts in the same way. I try to respect the unique way my own kids choose to be with others.
Saturday, January 1, 2011
Marking the Passage of Time
Of the many milestones over the past year, I think the most difficult was watching Marina take her very first class. It was a decision we fell into (all our homeschooling friends were putting their teens in college classes) and as with any fall, it took our breath away and left us smarting from the sudden impact.
The first thing I noticed is that many people are not sympathetic when you tell them your daughter is having difficulty with her one college class. Most kids have gone to school for at least thirteen years. They have clocked thousands of hours behind a desk in class and at home with homework. High school students have handed in dozens of papers and essays by the time they graduate. The idea of my daughter being anxious about her one class must seem pretty silly to them. And yet I can assure you, she shed many tears about whether she was ready for this. In fact, the anxiety was made worse by the lack of empathy she received. Add to this her need to prove that she could do it because she was homeschooled. All this pressure she put on herself while I stood by her and told her I would rather she withdrew from the class than feel she had to be the best of the best.
Marina takes her work seriously. She reminds me of myself as a college freshman. She does not measure herself against others. She felt the pressure of proving herself to herself, and in a completely new situation. She worried over every word of every essay. I read through many of them and offered advice whenever possible. I was concerned about the hours she spent in front of her laptop, alternating between online class discussions and homework assignments. This wasn't any college course. She had English 101 with one of the toughest professors at the school. When she showed me the instructions for her term project, I panicked. There were three pages of directions! When she eventually went to the college writing center for help, her tutor was surprised at the amount of work required! I pat myself on the back for restraining myself from invading her class and yelling at the professor for stressing my baby.
In the end, she got through it. Occasionally, she had glimpses of her fellow classmates' anxiety. She learned that she wasn't alone in her worries, even if this didn't help allay those concerns. By the time she went in for her final, the class was half its original size and she was one of the few with a completed portfolio and perfect attendance.
Throughout the long months of panic and tears, I repeatedly told her that this would end. I pointed out her periods of enjoying the class. Just as she loves her library job but has her less than stellar days, I knew she loved taking this class even though it wasn't easy. The only difference was that she received her reward at work every two weeks in the form of a paycheck. She hadn't yet received her reward for her class work, because no matter how many papers were returned to her, she worried about the next one. I knew that when that first grade was officially entered, she would be aglow with happiness. The final grade would come without future concerns. It would mean she was finished with this one class.
And yes, she got an "A". That's my girl!
The first thing I noticed is that many people are not sympathetic when you tell them your daughter is having difficulty with her one college class. Most kids have gone to school for at least thirteen years. They have clocked thousands of hours behind a desk in class and at home with homework. High school students have handed in dozens of papers and essays by the time they graduate. The idea of my daughter being anxious about her one class must seem pretty silly to them. And yet I can assure you, she shed many tears about whether she was ready for this. In fact, the anxiety was made worse by the lack of empathy she received. Add to this her need to prove that she could do it because she was homeschooled. All this pressure she put on herself while I stood by her and told her I would rather she withdrew from the class than feel she had to be the best of the best.
Marina takes her work seriously. She reminds me of myself as a college freshman. She does not measure herself against others. She felt the pressure of proving herself to herself, and in a completely new situation. She worried over every word of every essay. I read through many of them and offered advice whenever possible. I was concerned about the hours she spent in front of her laptop, alternating between online class discussions and homework assignments. This wasn't any college course. She had English 101 with one of the toughest professors at the school. When she showed me the instructions for her term project, I panicked. There were three pages of directions! When she eventually went to the college writing center for help, her tutor was surprised at the amount of work required! I pat myself on the back for restraining myself from invading her class and yelling at the professor for stressing my baby.
In the end, she got through it. Occasionally, she had glimpses of her fellow classmates' anxiety. She learned that she wasn't alone in her worries, even if this didn't help allay those concerns. By the time she went in for her final, the class was half its original size and she was one of the few with a completed portfolio and perfect attendance.
Throughout the long months of panic and tears, I repeatedly told her that this would end. I pointed out her periods of enjoying the class. Just as she loves her library job but has her less than stellar days, I knew she loved taking this class even though it wasn't easy. The only difference was that she received her reward at work every two weeks in the form of a paycheck. She hadn't yet received her reward for her class work, because no matter how many papers were returned to her, she worried about the next one. I knew that when that first grade was officially entered, she would be aglow with happiness. The final grade would come without future concerns. It would mean she was finished with this one class.
And yes, she got an "A". That's my girl!
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